That Kind of Week
Don't you just hate those days? Those days where nothing goes right. The day where you spill your coffee on your dress just as you get to work. The days that start with a dog or a kid (or both) throwing up on the rug. The ones where your best friend misunderstands you or the boss gets upset for something you didn't even know you did. Those days. Those days that can turn into weeks that turn into months. Seasons. Where it sometimes feels as if the universe has colluded against you and you are scared to move because who know what will go wrong next.
I have been in one of those seasons lately. And last week was just bad day after bad day where I felt so completely overwhelmed I could hardly breath. And to be honest, in the face of exhaustion and hurt, I threw a hissy fit with God. A good, ol' fashioned, three-year-old-style fit. I yelled and screamed at God, I cried, I begged, and I bargained. And like all good hissy fits, I felt worse after than when I had begun. God felt so far away as shame over my behavior settled in and felt like it was there to stay.
I was telling a friend about how I was feeling and why I was so hurt and tired. And as I sat on my couch, my feet curled under me, gripping a hot mug of tea, sharing my jealousy, exhaustion, my disappointment, I saw Jesus in her eyes. She listened to me, pain and care in her eyes. And she didn't try to tell me that it would be ok. That it would all change. She just listened and cared. She told me she loved me. That she was praying for me. Her words reminding me that Gods plan is good. That even though the circumstances aren't great, he is great. God is good and true. My circumstances often lie to me and tell me things aren't ok. But her presence and her love for me even when I am acting like a spoiled toddler, remind me that God loves me. That he's got me. He isn't running from my pain, he is close and he is listening.
Maybe you need that reminder today. The reminder that God is close, he loves you, and he is a good father. Or maybe, you need to be the reminder to someone today. Patiently listening to them and showing them the grace our Heavenly Father shows us.